\n<\/p>\n
It is a lovely day, and one of my favorite dogs is in for his grooming session. He is an 11-year-old Boerboel named Joey that comes every month.<\/p>\n
I get him up onto the table and, in typical Joey fashion, he sits on his bum and stretches his front feet out toward his head.<\/p>\n
I grin and ask,<\/em> \u201cComfy?\u201d<\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cOh yes, very comfy. I love table time.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI know buddy, I know,\u201d I say as I shave the fuzz off the top of his feet so he doesn\u2019t slip on the hardwood at home.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cThat tickles!\u201d He says while wiggling about.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cI know Mr. Tickletoes, I\u2019m going quick. I have to do this though or you\u2019ll slip on the floors and throw out a hip or something,\u201d I say as I finish the last foot.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cI never slip. It\u2019s called gliding, and it\u2019s done on purpose.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, well, you almost glided into your Dad at suppertime,\u201d I remind him.<\/em> \u201cLet\u2019s eliminate all the sliding and gliding and keep everyone safe, shall we?\u201d<\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cOK. Do I get a treat for being good boy?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, you get a treat for being a good boy,\u201d I tell him as I grab a freeze-dried beef liver treat and a drool rag.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey swallows the treat then makes faces at me while I wipe his mouth.<\/em>\u201cI love you honey, but I don\u2019t love your drool on my head,\u201d I say.<\/em><\/p>\n \u00a0Joey:<\/strong> \u201cLove is drool.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, so you\u2019ve said many times,\u201d I reply as I begin to file his nails.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cTickles!\u201d He wiggles.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cWell there isn\u2019t enough to clip them; there\u2019s barely anything there. You\u2019ve been putting in road work I see,\u201d I say to him.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cWe go for walks all the time now. Bad vet.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBad vet?\u201d I inquire.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cHe implied I was heavy.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHe did? What did he say?\u201d I ask, not at all surprised by this revelation.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cHe said, \u2018He\u2019s fat!\u2019 Can you believe that?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cErm, well\u2026,\u201d I murmur as his rolls of chub are jiggling as I brush him.<\/em> \u201cI suppose there may be a bit extra Joey to love, but exercise is good for you. You want to be here to have lots more spa days, don\u2019t you?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cI love spa days.\u201d He grins and kisses me across my eyeball.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cGak! Thanks, honey,\u201d I say as I rub the slobber off of my face.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cYup! I good boy.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI love you Joe, you\u2019re the best boy,\u201d I say with a chuckle.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cBest boys get treats!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNot until they\u2019re done, they don\u2019t get any more treats,\u201d I say as I get ready to clean his ears.<\/em> \u201cJoe, what are you growing in there? Your ears have never been this dirty. It\u2019s all road dirt. Bleh.\u201d<\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cSee? Exercise bad.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re all done! Shall we go get your picture taken?\u201d I ask as I unclip the loop.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cYES!\u201d He yanks me toward the picture room, making me thankful yet again for the dry deck.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cIf I die on the way there no one gets treats,\u201d I exclaim.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> Hops onto the picture platform and sits,<\/em> \u201cReady for treat!\u201d<\/p>\n I quietly tear a small treat into three pieces, <\/em>\u201cOK, here you go.\u201d And I pop one of the tiny pieces in his mouth.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey: <\/strong>\u201cReady for the treat!\u201d After he swallowed the tiny piece without even noticing it was in his mouth.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cErm\u2026you already ate it,\u201d I say as I put the bathrobe on him.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey looks around for the treat he ate as if he could see it, then looks at me.<\/em><\/p>\n I offer him the second treat between my fingers so this time he knows it\u2019s there and say,<\/em> \u201cOK, look at the camera, buddy!\u201d<\/p>\n Joey smiles at me.<\/em><\/p>\n I snap a few pictures and say,<\/em> \u201cNice job!\u201d as I offer him the last tiny piece.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cAre you making one treat three treats?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWell\u2026your Dad is working hard to help you lose weight so\u2026,\u201d I murmur.<\/em><\/p>\n Joey:<\/strong> \u201cIf I do good and I do road work like Dad says, can I go back to having regular- sized treats?\u201d<\/p>\n I chuckle and reply,<\/em> \u201cYes, Dear\u2026\u201d \u2702\ufe0f<\/p>\n<\/div>\n