{"id":351,"date":"2026-01-15T05:31:42","date_gmt":"2026-01-15T05:31:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/are-you-the-only-one-trying-what-to-do-about-one-sided-friendships\/"},"modified":"2026-01-15T05:31:42","modified_gmt":"2026-01-15T05:31:42","slug":"are-you-the-only-one-trying-what-to-do-about-one-sided-friendships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/are-you-the-only-one-trying-what-to-do-about-one-sided-friendships\/","title":{"rendered":"Are You the Only One Trying? What to do About One-Sided Friendships"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div id=\"\">\n<p>A few months ago, I found myself sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic, running late to meet my friend, \u201cSarah\u201d for dinner.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>As I inched along the highway toward her neighbourhood (45 minutes from mine), a familiar pattern started to crystallize.<\/p>\n<p>Every dinner with Sarah followed the same script: I\u2019d suggest getting together, she\u2019d pick a restaurant near her place, and I\u2019d battle cross-town traffic to meet her there.<\/p>\n<p>After years of friendship, I couldn\u2019t remember a single time she\u2019d offered to come to my neighborhood, or even meet somewhere in between.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>During our dinner, I decided to be direct:<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cI love catching up but I\u2019ve noticed I\u2019m often the one who has to initiate. Can you organize the next meetup somewhere in-between?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>She agreed,\u00a0<em>\u201cOf course!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Three months passed without a word from her.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Here\u2019s what I learned:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Sometimes we don\u2019t notice relationships are one-sided until we stop doing all the work<\/li>\n<li>If you are the glue holding a relationship together, resentment will build<\/li>\n<li>There\u2019s a difference between a blip and a chronic pattern. People who habitually take and do not reciprocate will continue behaving that way<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>When Sarah finally did reach out, it wasn\u2019t to catch up \u2013 it was because she needed something.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s when I realized:\u00a0<strong>this wasn\u2019t really a friendship \u2013 it was a pattern of convenience.\u00a0<\/strong>For her.<\/p>\n<p>Today, I have a simple rule:\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><strong>I match energy.<\/strong>\u00a0If someone consistently shows they won\u2019t meet me halfway \u2013 literally or figuratively \u2013 I take note and adjust my investment accordingly.<\/p>\n<p>Question for you:\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><strong>Are there any one-side relationships in your life? What would happen if you took you foot off the gas pedal?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>PS: You can read this blog that discusses what causes us to overgive.  Also, you can learn more about relationship patterns in my book \u201cBreakup Bootcamp.\u201d Check it out\u00a0here.<\/p>\n<div class=\"widget_text awac-wrapper\">\n<div class=\"widget_text awac widget custom_html-2\">\n<div class=\"textwidget custom-html-widget\">\n<div class=\"after-content-promo\" style=\"padding-bottom: 20px;\">\n<h4>Want to get over your breakup?<\/h4>\n<p>Get the Breakup Guide workbook. The Renew Breakup Guide will walk you through the entire process of healing from heartbreak, step by step. For only $14, the guide is packed with 60 pages of tools, exercises, and worksheets to help you repair your heart and move forward. Get it now.\n\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"sharedaddy sd-block sd-like jetpack-likes-widget-wrapper jetpack-likes-widget-unloaded\" id=\"like-post-wrapper-179594101-12028-69687bbedd9b8\" data-src=\"https:\/\/widgets.wp.com\/likes\/?ver=15.5-a.1#blog_id=179594101&amp;post_id=12028&amp;origin=hearthackersclub.com&amp;obj_id=179594101-12028-69687bbedd9b8\" data-name=\"like-post-frame-179594101-12028-69687bbedd9b8\" data-title=\"Like or Reblog\">\n<h3 class=\"sd-title\">Like this:<\/h3>\n<p><span class=\"button\"><span>Like<\/span><\/span> <span class=\"loading\">Loading&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span class=\"sd-text-color\"\/><\/div>\n<p><h3 class=\"jp-relatedposts-headline\"><em>Related<\/em><\/h3>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p><script type=\"text\/javascript\">\n!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?\nn.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;\nn.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;\nt.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,\ndocument,'script','https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/fbevents.js');\n<\/script><br \/>\n<br \/><br \/>\n<br \/><a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A few months ago, I found myself sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic, running late to meet my friend, \u201cSarah\u201d for dinner.\u00a0 As I inched along the highway toward her neighbourhood (45 minutes from mine), a familiar pattern started to crystallize. Every dinner with Sarah followed the same script: I\u2019d suggest getting together, she\u2019d pick a restaurant [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":352,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_daextam_enable_autolinks":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-351","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationships"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/kelly-sikkema-XX2WTbLr3r8-unsplash-scaled.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/351","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=351"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/351\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/352"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=351"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=351"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=351"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}