{"id":816,"date":"2026-01-15T11:41:31","date_gmt":"2026-01-15T11:41:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/its-okay-if-the-holidays-look-weird-for-you-mine-looks-like-a-10-foot-monster-on-the-lawn-the-bloggess\/"},"modified":"2026-01-15T11:41:31","modified_gmt":"2026-01-15T11:41:31","slug":"its-okay-if-the-holidays-look-weird-for-you-mine-looks-like-a-10-foot-monster-on-the-lawn-the-bloggess","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/diyhaven858.wasmer.app\/index.php\/its-okay-if-the-holidays-look-weird-for-you-mine-looks-like-a-10-foot-monster-on-the-lawn-the-bloggess\/","title":{"rendered":"It\u2019s okay if the holidays look weird for you. Mine looks like a 10-foot monster on the lawn. \u2013 The Bloggess"},"content":{"rendered":"


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I know many of us, including me, mourned the passing of Bone Crawford, but just in case you missed it:<\/p>\n

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The instructions to put together the Bumble said that it would take 2 people less than 30 minutes to put it together but Victor and I were standing on the lawn in the dark yelling at each other with flashlights for hours because it was complicated as hell and all the instructions were like, \u201cATTACH THE GLOPPERHOPPER TO THE SNORLAX WHILE SCREWING THE SNOCKLAP TO THE CLEEVE. MAKE SURE IT\u2019S THE LEFT CLEEVE OR IT WILL EXPLODE. SEE IMAGE OF DANCE REQUIRED.\u201d<\/p>\n

At a certain point I wanted to just leave it until the morning but it looked like this and I was worried that we\u2019d traumatize the neighborhood kids if they saw a Sasquatch that had been skinned and\/or was flashing everyone.<\/p>\n

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Anyway, we did finally complete all the pieces and it was totally worth it because yesterday I was walking Dorothy Barker and a woman walked by with a little girl in a stroller and the little girl whispered something and her mom sighed and said, \u201cOh, you\u2019ve gotta say hi to the monster again<\/em>? Okay, last time though and then you have to take a nap\u201d and the little girl giggled and all was right in the world.<\/p>\n

On a slightly related note, I just got back from 3 days in Canada and I have more on that later (it was amazing\u2026I miss you Canada!) but I\u2019m so tired (in a good way) that I haven\u2019t been able to move for a few days (thanks, chronic illness) and last night I was feeling like a bad mother because I\u2019m too tired to put up a tree and plan a Christmas dinner so instead Hailey and I wrapped a piece of garland around a pole and cut out a tiny Rory and this is now our Xmas pole. <\/p>\n

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I can\u2019t find the stockings so instead I\u2019m going tape ziplock freezer bags to the mantle. Christmas will be the three of us and we are just going to reheat tamales and it will be fine. All that to say that it\u2019s okay if your holiday doesn\u2019t look like anyone else\u2019s. <\/p>\n

Happy holidays, friends!<\/p>\n

PS. The actual instructions were about \u201csecured clevis’\u201d and \u201cmounting sliding cotter pins\u201d and are these real words? WTF.<\/p>\n

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Like this:<\/h3>\n

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